Visit a new restaurant

 

We all have our favorite restaurants and our favorite orders from those places, but how often do we go out of our comfort level to try something new? Sometimes it can feel scary, but for this date, try to make it more of an adventure in trying something new! Make sure that you choose a restaurant that you both haven’t ever been to before. The new atmosphere and new food will give both of you a sense of excitement for this date!

Your Daily R&R Tip! (Relationship Reconnection):

While on your date in this new restaurant, make sure to talk about the things you like and dislike about this new restaurant. Ask your spouse questions about the restaurant to learn more about each other—such as preferences to food, atmosphere, service, etc. For example, you could ask your spouse if the food they ordered is something that they would have again or not and why that is. You could share your feelings about the atmosphere—was it too casual, formal, unexpected? Make this discussion fun and a learning moment with your spouse. You’ll never know what answers and discoveries this new experience will bring about!

A penny drive escapade

Image courtesy of 'Gualberto107' from FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

 

For this date all you will need are:

-a car

-a penny

-a sense of adventure!

On this date you will be driving to an undisclosed location to the both of you. The way this location is determined? A penny! To start off, you’ll drive out of your driveway and come to the edge of your neighborhood. Whether you turn right or left is up to the flip of a coin. Take turns flipping the penny at each intersection. If the penny lands on heads, turn left; if tails, turn right. You’ll do this for 20 flips, and then you’ll stop at the venue closest to you—whether a field, store, restaurant, or neighborhood! Once there, go ahead and park and get out and take a walk together. If you ever come to a junction where turning in the direction the penny specified is impossible, go ahead and turn the other way, flipping the coin to determine the next possible turn.

Your Daily R&R Tip! (Relationship Reconnection):

With each flip of the coin, whoever is the one flipping it will take their turn telling their spouse something they appreciate about them. There should be enough time within each turn that elaboration on what you appreciate about your spouse can be said. Remember to trade off flipping for each turn so that each spouse can have the opportunity to share his or her appreciation as well as hear it from his or her spouse.

A tale for two

 

This date is one for the books; literally! You’ll be creating a short story with your spouse. Whether you enjoy writing or not, this date will require you and your spouse to work together creating a story that the two of you can look back on and have great memories to enjoy a few laughs about. The greatest part about it is that you don’t have to leave home!

Your Daily R&R Tip! (Relationship Reconnection):

The way that you will build your relationship through this date is up to you. Maybe you want to include ideas from weird and crazy dreams you’ve had into your story, taking the time to describe the details to your spouse. Maybe you want to write a story based on past experiences you’ve had with each other or from your childhood. Or maybe you want to write a story that could be expounded on and turned into a real novel someday. Whatever you end up writing about, make sure you both contribute to the story and make this a date to remember in a positive way.

Monet in mustard

 

 

Image courtesy of 'sattva' at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Did you ever finger paint in elementary school? Did you ever use condiments as your choice of paint? Well, now you can do both! For this date night activity you’ll need:

-newspaper

-paper/construction paper

-your choice of condiments (ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise, ranch, BBQ sauce, etc.)

-table (optional)

First, you’ll line your table or floor with newspaper so that any excess condiments that don’t make it onto paper won’t leave a mess everywhere else. Next, you’ll place the paper that you’ll be painting the condiments on down on the newspaper. Now, all that’s left to do is to squirt different condiments on your paper and smear them around, making whatever picture or art masterpiece you want.

Your Daily R&R Tip! (Relationship Reconnection):

Not only will this activity bond you and your spouse together because of the fun memories you can create and share later on, but it will also bond you emotionally as well. If you would like, for your ‘painting’ you can draw or depict your favorite date that you’ve ever been on with your spouse and have them guess what it was, using the drawing as a clue, and then switch. Then you can take turns and discuss why those dates were your favorites and what you liked most about them. 

20 Questions

 

 

I’m sure that you’ve heard of the game “20 Questions” at some point in your life. For this date you will be playing this game, taking the opportunity to learn more about your spouse. The materials you’ll need for this date are:

 -paper

-scissors

-writing utensil

-bowl

Both you and your spouse will write down 10 questions that you’d like to know about each other and questions that you’d feel comfortable answering yourself. You’ll then cut each question into its own slip of paper and put them in a bowl. You’ll then take turns picking out a question and reading it aloud. The spouse who didn’t pick the question will answer it first, and then the spouse who picked the question will answer it afterwards. This ensures that both spouses answer all 10 questions that were written by each other, making it 20 questions total.

Your daily R&R Tip! (Relationship Reconnection):

Remember to keep this game fun and enjoyable for the both of you. Do not ask questions that you wouldn't feel comfortable answering yourself or that may hurt your spouse's feelings. You may be answering questions that are on a deeper level, so fight the urge to get defensive or put up walls. This is an opportunity to become vulnerable in order to really connect with your spouse.

What treasures will you find on your date night

Image Courtesy of: https://www.geocaching.com/

There is a new trend that you may have not heard about, or maybe you have heard, but haven’t tried it. If you are looking for a fun and free date night, look no further than, Geocaching. Geocaching is a large treasure hunt.  You begin by either downloading the app, or signing up on their website. After signing up (don’t worry, signing up is free) on the Geocaching website you can search in your area for a Geocach near you. Then, you follow the map to find a hidden treasure!

Relationship Reconnection:

You will have a lot of time on your hands as you go around town, and you will need something to do. Try rekindling your relationship by talking to each other.  There is only one rule during the car ride don’t talk about; the kids, the house, your jobs, bills, in-laws, or anything/anyone else. Make up a list of your own question that you can ask each other, that can help keep the conversation moving, use this list as a guide. Or, take turns answering the following questions;

1.) When was it that you first realized that you were in love with your spouse?

2.) I first knew you were the one when….

3.) I have never laughed harder than when {you, me, we} did this….

4.) Remember when…

5.) If  you could live anywhere, where would it be?

6.) What would you buy with your last five dollars?

7.) What is something that you’ve never told anyone?

8.) If you had a superpower, what would it be?

9.) If you won the lottery what would you spend your money on?

By taking the time to laugh, reminisce, and getting to know each other even more, you may find yourself falling in love all over again. You may end up finding more hidden treasures on this date than you bargained for.

Monkey around date night

Image Courtesy of Anankkml at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

What could make you feel young at heart more, than going to the Zoo, and flirting with your date?  For date night this week, take your spouse to The Houston Zoo. They offer free passes every first Tuesday of the month from 2pm to close. The Zoo isn't just for kids in fact, going to the Zoo as an adult can be really fun! When you visit the Zoo with your children, the day tends to get pretty planned out. Suzie wants to see the elephants, Jimmy wants to see the snakes, Bobby wants to see the birds, etc. When you go to the Zoo with children, everyone has their own agenda. When you go on your date night to the Zoo, toss the map, and simply walk around. Don’t plan your visit, just take your time, and enjoy yourselves.

While you are at the Zoo, try strengthening your relationship with your spouse. Think back to when you were dating. Remember that first date, where you were dying to hold hands? Remember resting your hand in places that your date would easily be able to access your hand to hold it? Just because you are married now, doesn't mean that the excitement has to stop. Here is a relationship building activity that is sure to not disappoint: 

Have you ever heard the song by the group, Extreme called, More than Words? In the song it says, “more than words is all I ever needed you to show, than you wouldn’t have to say, that you love me ‘cause I already know”.  I have a simple way that you can show your spouse that you love them, without saying any words. Try giving your spouse’s hand a squeeze three times in a row (for the three words; I, love, you). If your spouse doesn’t get why you are squeezing their hand repeatedly, simply smile and say the words, “I Love You” while squeezing their hand. Try showing your spouse that you are truly listening to them by looking in their eyes as they talk.

Team work date night

Photo courtesy of http://nstacommunities.org/blog/2015/07/29/building-team-science/

Going out on a date night sometimes isn’t possible, there seems to always be something that gets in the way of going on a date. The babysitter canceled last minute, you don’t have enough money to go out - and pay a babysitter at the same time, you ended up working late and didn’t get home in enough time, or you live in a rural area and the city is too far of a drive for a date night. The list goes on an on – but who said dating meant that you had to actually “go out”? No matter what the reasoning is for skipping date night, we have a great alternative a "date night in", instead of a date night out.

Often times you hear talk of team work with sports teams, or in the work place, but who said team building activities are just for those groups? The Marital unit is just as much of a team as any of the above mentioned groups. A marriage is the most important team you will ever be a part of. For this date night in you will need the following items:

-              Two ace bandages

-              Brownie box mix

-              Ingredients listed on the back of the brownie box.

-              8X8 baking dish

-              Mixing bowel

-              Whisk

-              Spatula

You will start this activity by tying the right hand of one spouse behind their back, then tying the left hand of the other spouse behind their back. Working together as a team, bake brownies together. This will likely be hard at first, as you are working, make sure to have fun - this is a date night after all!

The joy of dating

Photo courtesy of
  http://www.hudsonandemily.com/
10-creative-date-night-ideas/

Chances are, you and your spouse don’t share all the same hobbies, interests, or talents. Most likely you are completely different people. That’s the best part about being married, that you can be totally different, yet enjoy each other’s company anyways. This date night defiantly costs money, and isn’t one that you would choose if you were trying to save money. This is another “date night in”, and you are looking at staying home tonight. This activity is just as much fun as going out, because it provides a more intimate experience for the two of you. Whether or not one, both, or neither of you paint, learning to paint together can be a really great experience.

For this activity you will need to purchase a painting instructional DVD. There are several single instructional DVD’s, but my favorite is the, Bob Ross: The Joy of Painting- Nine One- Hour Instructional Painting Guides. I like that this is a DVD set that gives you more options on what you can paint, where as the single DVD’s only teach you one type of scene to paint. You will also need paint’s and different paintbrushes. I would buy these things after you have bought your DVD so that you know what supplies you will need for following along with the DVD.

Painting together can help build your relationship. While you are painting and laughing at your mistakes, or pointing out what you and your spouse did well, you will find out that with painting, “there are no mistakes, just happy accidents”. You can liken this to your marriage. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes, but we can move passed them, and turn the bad things into a beautiful piece of artwork.

Spontaneously romantic date night

Photo courtesy of,
 http://xteena21.blogspot.com/2011_09_01_archive.html

Think back to one of the most romantic days of your married life, the honeymoon. What made the honeymoon so special, romantic, and memorable? Surprise your spouse with decorating your bedroom to look like your honeymoon suite, and if you didn’t have a honeymoon suite, decorate your room anyways. If you are using flower pedals, spring for some good quality silk rose petals so that you can reuse them later. Buy candles, chocolate kisses, maybe make some chocolate covered strawberries. The sky’s the limit here, be creative! Don’t just use this date night activity on your anniversary, do this on a whim, it will mean that much more to your spouse. Enjoy your date night in, by surprising your spouse with a romantically decorated room. This one is sure to please.

Relationship Reconnection:

This kind of date night activity will help build your marriage. It will make you and your spouse feel that you are cared about. One of the best signs that you are in a healthy, sustainable marriage, is the ability to look back on the past and remember your life together in a positive light. During this date night, talk about all the great memories you have with being married. Talk about the ups and the downs that have made you draw closer together. Reminisce about the good ol’ times.

Chalk isn't just for kids

It can be hard to be really creative on a budget. Stress can also seem to hinder those creative juices flowing. Luckily this date idea will tap into your creative side as well as bring back a few of those childhood memories!

All you will need for this date is some sidewalk chalk and a worthy sidewalk to draw on. You will want to take the sidewalk chalk either to the nearest sidewalk or your favorite stretch of sidewalk; it just needs to be divided into segments. Once you are there, your goal is to each create a comic book strip of your favorite memory together as a couple, with each segment of sidewalk being a new window in your comic book strip!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

This activity allows for some reminiscing, just remember to keep it positive when thinking of and drawing out those memories. Once you have each drawn your memories, sit and talk about what made each of those memories so special and important to you. Remember that what you put into this is what you will get out of it, so really try to make it fun and rewarding as a couple!

"Chopped dinner competition"

Are you a culinary master? Do you feel like you can compete pretty well in a kitchen? Well, even if you don’t, this fun date idea is still sure to turn out some either delicious results, or some blunders that will have you laughing in the end!

On the TV show Chopped, contestants are given a mystery basket of ingredients and are forced to make something delicious out of it. Since this won’t be prepared for you, just use what is already in your kitchen! Each of you will look at the ingredients available to you in your own kitchen, fridge, pantry, etc., and compete with each other to see who can make the best dish out of what is available.

This is a great idea if you need to stay at home, and allows you to make something out of what you already have! Also, don’t be afraid to get the kids to judge, just remember to keep it light and fun, this is not to see who is the better cook or parent or anything, but rather an easy at-home idea to bring fun into the home after a busy week!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

This activity might keep you busy while you are completing it, due to the idea that it’s a competition J In effort to reconnect, once all of the cooking and judging is done, choose to wash the dishes together as a couple. As you do this, use this time to talk about your week so far and the plans that you have for the rest of the week as well as some future plans you want to fulfill. Couples that plan together, and are aware and respectful of their spouse’s plans, will be able to be a better support for reaching those future goals, and you may find some aspirations in common that you did not realize before. As always, be positive and respectful, and this will be a truly building experience!

Theme night

Have you ever had a night where you felt like being Italian? What about Greek? Well this date night allows you to indulge in those desires! For this theme date night, all you need to do is choose the theme and then make decisions from there. This theme does not necessarily have to be a country, it could be themed around a movie, or superheroes, or anything that gets you both excited for the date!

The goal, once the theme is chosen, is to then choose a dinner recipe and movie to watch at home that follow with this theme. You could also add decorations, music, etc. to really help get the feeling for where you are going to be spending your evening. Make sure you choose the theme before the date night so that you have plenty of time to get everything you need!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

For this date, the reconnection activity should ideally happen during dinner. It is easy to get down in the dumps bout your circumstances; stress can lead you to negative thoughts, which can enter us into a nasty cycle. To reconnect during this date, start a conversation over dinner going back and forth between each other listing things that you are grateful for and see how long you can go! These should be meaningful, and could possibly lead to further discussion and reminiscing together. The idea is to help focus on the good, even amongst the crazy, and appreciate together all that you have in order to make life look a little more positive.

Picture this

When was the last time you got professional pictures taken with just you and your spouse? Aside from family pictures with extended family members or with your children, how long has it been? For most of us, the last time we took professional pictures with just our spouse was when we were taking engagement and wedding photos. For most of us, we make sure we take professional pictures of our kids each year, or we take pictures of them on their birthdays or first day of school. But as adults, we don’t often find the time to document (with photos) our lives with our spouse. For this next date night activity, dress up and get your pictures professionally taken! No kids aloud! What a great way to spend time together.

Bonding over music

Picture courtesy of,
http://www.confettidaydreams.com/rocking
-the-country-engagement-shoot/

For this weeks date night, learn an instrument together. This date may take up several date nights, because learning an instrument together takes time. Learning a new skill together is a great way to have something in common, it gives you the opportunity to share interests with each other, and can give you the satisfaction of accomplishing something together. Though this is a great date night activity, this date actually provides more than just “something to do”, this activity can aid in strengthening your marriage. Henry Ford said, “Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is a process. Working together is success”. You started your life together by getting married, doing weekly date nights is the “keeping together” part of the process.

Iron Chef date night

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Instead of going out to eat at a restaurant, try cooking something different and special at home! There is a company called, Blue Apron and they send you a box of ingredients and a recipe to make a delicious home cooked meal out of. Buy two of their boxes and have an Iron Chef competition between the two of you. Take the recipe cards and put them in a bowel and draw the cards at random, whichever card you choose, is the meal that you are in charge of making. Then, after the meals are cooked, divide each in half and try both of the meals. Don’t forget to dub someone the winner. The cost of the meals is $59.94, for three meals which serves two people. You can choose which meals you want off their website, and you can cancel at any time. You have the choice between six different meals per week, so if you don’t find something that you’d like for this week, check out what’s on the menu the next few weeks. Spending time together and having a little healthy competition is a great way to spend your date night.

Book club for two

Book clubs can get a really poor reputation for being long and boring. They can also have a reputation for attracting older ladies who read lots of romance novels. Well, this date night is much different than both of those things, so you are safe!

For this date night you will want to go to your local public library. Once there, look around at some books together and grab a couple that interest you each. Then work together and choose one book that you would each like to read together. Read as far into the book as you would like, and then pose your own “book club” and discussion as a couple.

This date allows you to share interest in something together, and grow together in a different and educational way!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

For this activity, since we are already at a library, each of you should find your favorite childhood book, either picture or chapter book. Then you can talk about why this book was your favorite and what memories you have associated with it. This will just be another fun fact you can learn about your spouse to appreciate them even more.

Make your own year in review

No, its not new years, but reviewing the year you have had so far can be a really rewarding experience! All you will need is your spouse and a pen and paper. You will each work together to compile a list of things you want to be included on your review, such as your greatest accomplishment this year, favorite memory, best meal, favorite date, and so on. The challenge is to keep this activity positive; focus on the good things that happened and be willing to let go of the bad.

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

When composing this activity for a date night, it can be easy to get distracted by the negative and hard things that happened during the year. But there is always next year and ways to make the struggles easier. To reconnect during this date night, after you had composed your year in review, each of you make 3 goals that you have for the next year, and then also make a plan for HOW you are going to accomplish these goals. Keep each other motivated to work towards your goals and try to stick to your plan to make it happen!

Living room campout

Ever get the camping blues? Or want to go camping but the weather doesn’t cooperate? Well, I do! This date takes care of those camping needs, no matter what it looks like outside! All you have to do is grab your tent (not necessary if you don’t want) but definitely your sleeping bags, pillows, blankets, and lantern, and set up camp right in your living room!

To keep up the camping festivities, you can also turn on the stove burner and roast some marshmallows, and heat up some hot cocoa to enjoy around your (pretend) fire. It may seem silly, but it can be great fun to camp, even inside your own home, to feel like you are getting away from all of your worries and just enjoying the little vacation you have created for yourselves as a couple.

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

Everyone loves stories told around the campfire, right? Well, after you and your spouse get your marshmallows roasted and your hot chocolate heated up and ready, sit around your little make believe campfire and think of the story of how you met and fell in love. It can be so fun to look back and relive the feelings and events that led up to your dating, engagement, and now marriage. Each of you should share your version of the story and just appreciate how far you have come, and how much you have grown together as a couple!

Go to a playground

Playgrounds aren’t just for little kids, you know. For this date, all you need is your spouse and transportation to your favorite playground in your area! In the evening most kids are at home, so playgrounds are open and free! This is a chance for you and your spouse to get familiar with the kid in each of you and play some of those old playground games you grew up on, and maybe make up some of your own. Just enjoy the outdoors and the fun that you can make with even the simplest of scenery!

Some suggestions may be games like lava monster, tag, monkey bars, etc., just allow yourself to have fun and take a break from the week that you have had to enjoy some good old clean fun.

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

Playgrounds automatically make us think of little kids. For this date, during or after all of the playground fun, take time to sit and talk to each other about families. Whether you have a family, want a family, don’t want a family, etc., take time to share some of your deeper feelings and desires with your spouse, to help create a common ground on which to build your future, and to bring you closer as a couple as you learn to confide in each other these important aspects of your life.

Volunteer together!

One of the best ways to build a healthy relationship is to serve others together. This volunteering can take place at any location you would like; it just depends on what type of people you are! There are animal shelters that let you walk dogs, homeless shelters where you can serve food, you can even work together to make a blanket or something that you can donate to those who are less fortunate.

Another way that you can volunteer right at home is through cooking meals or baking. We all have neighbors, and often there is a good chance that those neighbors have struggles and would really appreciate a kind gesture. You can make a meal or bake some goodies together, and then go drop them off at that neighbor’s house together to let them know that you are aware of them and you wanted to help in this small way; they will definitely appreciate it!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

One of the hardest things to do for some people is to ask for help. The women in my family especially struggle with this, and I have seen how their lives have been made harder because they refused such help. For this date, on the idea of service and volunteering that we were focusing on, I would like you to take some time to think about how you can serve your wife. Each of you think of one way that your spouse could help you, and share it with them. Then each think of something separate you could each do for your spouse. Take these two things that have been expressed for how you can serve your spouse, and work on them specifically that week. This will strengthen your marriage relationship and will also create positive outcomes!

Game night competition

Many family households nowadays have some sort of gaming systems, or even board games. Tonight it would be fun to create a little friendly competition between you and your spouse! There are many different games such as board games, video games, card games, etc. that you can choose from.

Work together and choose 3 games, of the various choices listed above, and have a little tournament with each other. Best 2 out of 3 wins! You can always add more, but this is a good start. Just remember that this is friendly competition; we don’t want negative feelings or words entered into the experience otherwise it will significantly lower the enjoyment.

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

To reconnect during this game night, talk about each of your absolute top date night you have ever gone on together. It is always fin to reminisce and recall those happy memories! Each of your favorites does not have to be the same, and it is likely that you will each think of a different one. Talk about why this was your favorite, and if you can, try and recreate these date nights again some time in the future! It never hurts to repeat a date night, and it can be fun to get all excited about the planning and details all over again!

Project DIY

Many of us in our homes have one thing or another that we would really like to change or get done, but just do not have the time. Why not do something like this together? Dates come in all different shapes and sizes, just like people, and this one may seem strange but just give it a chance!

Each of you make a list of things that you would like to get done around the house, change, decorate, etc. and then collaborate together. Choose one that you would like to work on together for your date that night! The night can then consist of going to get the supplies you need, and then working together on some good old manual labor to complete a project you have been sitting on for who knows how long! This not only gives you the sense of accomplishment for completing this project, but you also did it together and worked as the team that you are!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

In light of building things for this date night, take some time to sit and talk together about the foundation and structure of your relationship. What is your marriage founded on? What principles build up the structure of your home and your family? I like diagrams, and one that could be fun to make together is a triangle diagram designed similar to the old food triangle, with a base and different levels leading to the top. Design your own “marriage triangle” including the structures and foundations that you just created for your marriage as a couple. Once complete, keep this a reminder of what you have built together and what you can continue to build as your marriage grows and strengthens!

Walk it out

 

Walks are not only good for the body physically, but they are also great for your mind mentally and emotionally! I don’t know about you, but I have found that going on walks helps me solve the little worries I have and brings everything into perspective.

Tonight, why don’t you and your spouse take a walk, either to a predetermined destination, or just wander and let your legs take you where they may! Explore the area around you, and explore each other and what each of you are going through.

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

A great conversation topic for this walk would be expressing to each other what it means to you to be a husband or a wife. Oftentimes when we marry we sort of just fall into these new titles without understanding what they mean. No matter how long you have been married, this activity can be uplifting for all! Each of you will find meaning in different things, but be open-minded and really listen to what your spouse has to say; you may learn something new about them! Understanding and working on these amazing titles that we hold as husband and wife can help us appreciate all that our spouses do, and also be motivated to be the best husband or wife we can be!

A night of questions and answers

How well do you really know your spouse? Well tonight is the night to find out! For this date night, all you will need is each other, a pencil and a piece a paper for you both. To begin, each creates 20 fill in the blank questions you want your spouse to answer. These can be any question you want! An example would be the question, ”My favorite thing about you is          ” and so on and so forth. Each of you creates your 20 and then give it to the other to fill in!

Once you have each filled our your spouses list, go through one at a time and compare the answers you got to the correct answers your spouse was thinking. Don’t worry if you got any wrong, even if you did, now you know!

Don’t Forget to Reconnect!

To end this question and answer session you had together, now it is time to make a list. Each of you makes a list about why you love your spouse. These can be anything from, “he rubs my feet when I am tired” to “she always keeps a clean house.” Try to mix it up with some that are deep and some that are lighter. Once you are done, give your list to your spouse and just appreciate them for who they are to you!

Rekindle the love

 

As you face the challenges of every day life, it can be hard to remember to put time and energy into your relationship. With kids, work, and other duties, time can be hard to come by. As a couple, take the time to make a "Couple's Calendar". This CAN include your individual appointments, so that you can know what is going on in each other's lives, but I would recommend keeping it just to your relationship. You can use another calendar for your weekly events, if needed. John Gottman, Ph.D, speaks of creating "Love Maps". He uses this to refer to the part of the brain that keeps track of all of your spouses information. He suggests that this can greatly improve your marital satisfaction. Creating this calendar can give you an opportunity to do just that. You can read more about his love maps in his book, "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work."

On this calendar, I would suggest scheduling time for a weekly date, for 15-30 minutes of quiet conversation a few times a week, and time for intimacy. It may sound strange to have to schedule time for intimacy, but we all know how important it can be in a relationship. Making sure that it is part of your life can be a pivotal moment in your relationship. I would recommend finding a quiet place to create this calendar, maybe on a hike, in front of the fire, or even in a quiet park.

Time capsule

 

 

A time capsule is a great way to preserve your history for those in the future, or even for yourself.   For this date, you will be creating a Love Time Capsule.  Each of you will create a capsule for the other person.  The idea is to create capsules that you will open in a designated time in the future that will remind you of the things you loved about each other during this moment in time.  Sit down and create your time capsules together, but try not to let them know exactly what you are putting in there so it will be a surprise when you open it in the future.  Here are some ideas of things to include:

- Write a letter to them expressing why you love them and what you look forward to doing with them in the future.  Write about what things you enjoy doing together right now or maybe something funny that happened together.
- Write about an experience you had together recently that you really loved.
- Print off your favorite picture of them that has been taken in the past couple of weeks, and write on the back why you love it so much.
- A ticket stub from movie or a concert that you went to together in the last month.
- Put a sample of their perfume/cologne that they are wearing these days that you like.

You can be creative and think of lots of other fun ideas too!  You will most likely need some pictures to put in there, so choose your favorites and head over to a nearby print shop to print them off.  Then, choose a place to put your time capsule that you will be able to access in the future.  Bury it in the backyard or hide it away somewhere in your house.  Set a time when you will open them together, maybe set a certain anniversary date that you will crack them open.  As you create these, you will most likely think of many different reasons that your spouse is amazing, and then be reminded of those things when you open them in the future! Good luck!

Book Club

 

Sharing interests is one way in which you can improve your relationship with your partner. This date idea is one that can be carried out over weeks, or you can even have one simple date night in which you discuss what you both have read. Take the time to find a book that you and your partner would both enjoy. It could be a self-help book, a work of fiction, or even a biography. You can either read it together, or read it separately and come together and discuss it.

Reconnecting Idea:
Reading together can be an awesome way to reconnect. Not only does it help you share interests, but it gives you something interesting or new to talk about. The books that your partner chooses to read can also show a different side of them that you maybe haven't even seen before. It can be a learning opportunity to discover their interests. Reading can be a very intimate thing, and to share this with your partner, can make your relationship even more intimate.

Skateland

Skateland

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Grab your spouse and head over to 7 E. Southern Ave Mesa, AZ and go roller skating at Skateland. They have several different days and times to fit your busy schedule. They have skates to rent-both figure and in line. They also feature a snack bar with items ranging from drinks and snow cones, to pizza and nachos, so stop by and enjoy a treat.

Relationship Reconnection:

While you are snacking, talk to each other about other adventures you want to try together as a couple. Set a goal to try one of those adventures in the next 6 months. Couples who set goals and accomplish them together stay stronger and have a happier marriage.

Krazy Air

Krazy Air

Krazy Air is a 28,000 Sq. Ft trampoline park located in Mesa. Inside of the trampoline park is a Krazy Subs Restaurant. During your meal tell your spouse something you need to forgive him/her for. Forgiveness is a powerful tool and can help you as a couple become closer and more connected.

The Heard Museum

Heard Museum

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The Heard Museum offers a wide variety of Native American art. The museum is located at 2301 N. Central Ave Phx, AZ 85004

Relationship Connection: As you are walking through the museum ask each other which piece of art is his/her favorite and how if makes him/her feel. Also, ask each other what language he/she would want to learn and why? Make sure you are holding hands throughout the museum. 

Sunrise and breakfast

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There is just something special about getting up early in the quiet of the morning with your spouse to watch the sunrise.  During this peaceful setting you can sit and talk about your dreams and desires for your marriage.  In what ways can you build your friendship?  Day dream about places you want to see together.  Just enjoy each other's company.

 

After you watch the sunrise go and dine in at the Waffle House

Welcome Dinner

Welcome Dinner

At the welcome dinner they make all of their food from scratch so that it is fresh when you get it!

While you are waiting for your food ask each other the following questions:

You’re stepping onto a tour bus. Where are you?

What do you want to do on your 50th wedding anniversary?

Your spouse hands you some love coupons. What do you hope they are for? 

You’ve just sprouted wings. Where do you fly?

 Your pet can talk. What do you say to each other?

Thrift store shopping

Savers

 

  For this date you each get $5 to find the craziest and wackiest item.  

Afterwards decide who won and then head over to Baskin Robbins and order a sundae, milkshake, or one of their other yummy concoctions.  

 

While you are enjoying your cold treat, play this simple game: one person thinks of a word and then the other person says the first thing that comes into their mind, then the other person says the first thing that comes to their mind etc...  Example:  the first person says snow, the second person says cold, the first person then says ice, and you keep taking turns.  Super fun game!

Let's go fly a kite!

Pick up a kite from a local store and have a competition to see who can fly there kite the highest!

After your done flying kites, list 10 things you want to do together for fun.  Make plans to finish one per month.

Mystery Castle

Mystery Castle

Take a walk around Through the Mystery Castle.  Enjoy the beautiful scenery.  As you are walking tell your spouse all of the things you are thankful for that he/she does.  Sometimes we forget to thank our spouse for things and we start to take him/her  for granted.  We all need to feel appreciated.

Scuba-AZ

Scuba-AZ

If you have ever wanted to see what it is like to try to go scuba diving then you should check this out. Scuba AZ offers a 35.00 dollar course that introduces you to scuba diving. You can also take other courses to get certified.

This will definitely be a date you will remember!

Read together

The Phoenix Metro area is exceptionally large  and can take a long time to get from one part to another, so find your closest local library. If you don't have a library card then get one and browse through some books with your spouse that interest you. Take turns reading a chapter a night before you go to bed. Reading a book together can help you learn something new or take you to a new world.

Relationship Connection: Dating your spouse feeds the fires of romance. Routine tends to set in after marriage; by dating it will keep the romance alive in your marriage.

Wildlife World

Wildlife World

Wildlife World

Take a walk on the wild side at Wildlife World where they have a variety of exotic animals and reptiles ranging from a real life river monster to really cute exotic cats like the cheetah.

Relationship Reconnection  Bring a couple of pens and paper and take some time afterwards to sit and write a letter to each other.  In this letter, try to define what love is without actually using the word love.  Write about what it is that makes you have these feelings for each other and when you can't actually use the word "love" it will get you thinking of some creative ways to express your care and concern for each other in a special way.  When you are done, share them with each other.  These letters will surely be something you will cherish forever.

Pheonix Art Museum

Phoenix Art Museum

The Phoenix Art Museum has grown to have an international reputation for excellence. They have over 18,000 works which have been visited by millions. Going to the Phoenix Art Museum is a wonderful opportunity to observe all of the unique gifts that people have. While your on your date think about the gifts that your spouse has perhaps you could even mention to them how much you appreciate their talents.

Relationship Reconnection: Common activities lead to shared feelings.  This increases the amount of shared memories you have together.  Make sure you have a regular date night.

West World Paint Ball

West World Paint Ball

Try doing something that will really put some excitement into your life. At West World Paint Ball they have set up a great obstacle courses. Some of these courses include a sniper tower and others have fog machines and special lighting.

Relationship Reconnection After you have enjoyed a great day paint-baling, go out and grab some ice cream or get a soda then talk about the level of trust you have in your relationship.  John Gottman said, "Trust is built in very small moments in which one person turns toward their partner when they're in need.  When our partner responds positively, by "being there" for us, that builds trust".  When has your spouse "been there" for you?  Are there ways they could be there for you more in the future? Takes turns answering these questions for each other so that you can build the trust within your relationship. 

Go cart racing

K1 Speed

 

Do you want to feel an amazing rush of excitement? Or perhaps the wind in your hair as you speed down a track like a Nascar driver? If you do then go to K1 speed where you can spend your evening pretending to be a professional race car driver. A little competition between you and your spouse isn't a bad thing.

Relationship Reconnection: Talk about your first date- what did you do?  How were you feeling?  What did you think about each other after that date?  Sharing memories can help you reconnect with one another.

Nerf wars

Head to your local retailer and pick out a couple of Nerf guns- one for each of you.  Then head back home and get take out from Quiznos It is time to play Nerf War!  Make sure you do not aim for the head or eyes.  Each of you have your gun, now it is time to see who runs out of bullets first!  Whoever loses has to give the other person a foot massage.    

"It (date night) will help rekindle the flame and allow you to experience some of the fun times that made you fall in love with your spouse in the first place."

While enjoying your food, reminisce about the fun times you had while you were dating before you were married.  What are some of those things you want to do again?  Plan a couple of those date nights for the next month.

Golden Corral

Do you have an empty pit in your stomach? Do you have a craving for something? Perhaps you and your spouse could agree to satisfy whatever it is by going to Golden Corral! At Golden Corral they have a wide variety of dishes ranging from pizza to fried chicken and they are an all you can eat buffet... so if you leave hungry it is your fault.

Relationship Reconnection:

After you have had you fill go home and look over your wedding photos and reminisce about the good times that you had together.

Art Date!

Pick up some colored pencils and paper and then go to the park where you can draw the scenery, modern art or each other.  But whatever you choose to draw don't forget to be happy spending time together!

Relationship Connection: Life truly is a beautiful thing and it is easy to lose sight of that. I think that a good reminder can be when we give our conscious thought to looking at the beautiful scenery around us or when we feel the cool breeze pass us by. Marriage is the same way, give some thoughtfulness to all of the good that your spouse does and is.

Fat Cats!

Fat Cats

Try your skill by trying to be the best mini golfer you have ever been or you can also see who will win the highest points in a arcade game competition! Whatever you choose to do, choose to spend the evening enjoying the company of your best friend, your spouse.

Relationship Reconnection: 

One of Dr. John Gottman's 7 Principles to Successful Relationships is to create shared meaning.  This means that it is important to create those big and small rituals that you do together as a couple. This might mean something as simple as going grocery shopping together every Tuesday or an annual vacation you guys go on each year.  As you go throughout your mini golf course, try to identify together the rituals that you already do together and try to think of some that you would like to start.

Dollar Store date

Each of you get $5 to spend at the dollar store. Here are the rules:

1.  You must pick out items you think your spouse would like.

2.  Your spouse must not see you pick out your items.

3.  You must not see the items your spouse is choosing for you!

4.  Set a certain amount of time to choose your items- 15 minutes or so.

Lunch date!

Pick out a restaurant that you have never been to or one you really enjoy. 

Relationship Reconnection:

During your lunch date discuss the following ideas:

I picture us old, sitting in a rocking chair and you looking over at me and saying, “Daggum it, we never…”

The world’s best anniversary trip would be to go to…

No matter how much time you have you can still make times for your dates.

Karaoke at home!

Find songs with lyrics on them on Youtube.com and take turns singing. Add some dance moves and it can be quite fun! Don’t forget to take pictures! 

 

Take out and paint

Relieve some creative energy! Grab some paint, some canvas, and some brushes. Take turns creating a masterpiece, either blindfolded or not. See what you and your partner can create together. If you would rather, you can just create your own masterpiece and share with your partner your artistic ability, or lack thereof. You can even try and create a portrait of your spouse! Before you start, go to Panda Express and order some yummy takeout!

Relationship Reconnection:
Working together or parallel in a creative setting allows the opportunity for quality interaction. It can enable you and your partner time to reconnect with one another; get to know each other better and remember what made you fall in love in the first place.