Love is a positive interaction

Come visit the Arizona Pioneer Museum

To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with." 

-Mark Twain

 

Explore a historic Museum such as this one located in Flagstaff Arizona. Take the time to reminisce on your love and the meaning that has to each of you. Ask each other what it means, and keep in mind it can mean something different to each spouse. 

On this particular date work toward strengthening your positive interaction.

 

Positive Interaction

Love is a decision that each individual decides on as wether it is found to be important to them or not important. Your love can decide where you will end up based upon how you are interacting with each other. If you want to end up together throughout the years to come, then each spouse needs to make a personal commitment to work on interacting positively. Ceaseless pinpricking and sly remarks will not guarantee a happy marriage, rather it will be one that is focused on fault finding and conflict.

 

Next, read this article as a couple and ponder what it means to you each individually - ask yourselves how you can work on being better to push out the negative and allow in the positive for your marriage.  

To avoid that negativity here is one way a couple can acquire more healthy interactions:

 

Couples can focus on positive qualities by making and sharing lists of those things they admire and appreciate about each other. They should be things that made you fall in love with your spouse.

 

 

These can also be things like personal traits (intelligent, witty, funny) talents like (a good listener) something you especially like about him or her (love the way they laugh) or even a feature of your relationship that you like ("I like how we you finish each other’s thoughts") or something positive your spouse has done for you, and make sure it is written down.

From this list choose two or three qualities and rehearse them silently in your mind. Put them on an index card and in places where you can see them and think about them (they need to be visible places you see often). Do this daily for up to two weeks. Rotate different qualities from the list and repeat the activity. 

 

 

 

This is one way couples can override the temptation to be negative toward one another. 

Couples who nurture their fondness and admiration for one another in this way are better able to accept each other’s flaws and weaknesses and prevent them from threatening their relationship (Gottman & Silver, 1999).